Road Warrior Princess

Dichotomy

It is the season in which we vote on the Freddie Awards.  If you don't know what the Freddie Awards are, you are no road warrior.  The Freddie Awards are basically a chance for travelers to vote for our favorite travel programs.

I am not sure that this is why the pilot for my first flight of the day actually took the time today to walk through the aisles of the plane (yes, the pilot) to thank all of us row by row.  I am also not sure that this is the reason that the front desk of my hotel called me just to check on me after I arrived.  But I am pretty effing sure that it is NOT the reason that the flight attendant on my second flight of the day acted like a totally condescending, rude, and disrespectful jerk. 

A fuzzy overcoat was the initial victim of her disdain.  "Whose is this?! Who put this here?" she barked as she yanked the coat from the overhead bin.  "And who put this purse here?! Ya'll have been REALLY bad..."

I am usually the first to become irritated with the lack of space in overhead bins as the result of passengers who don't follow proper etiquette, like using both the space above and below for belongings, and putting your jacket in last, only if others around you have placed their bags.  Now this airline employee was shrieking out all those thoughts I had always had kept to myself...so why was I so offended at her outburst? 

I had just been seated and was about to forgive the airline in my mind for not getting an upgrade this flight (thanks to the friendly PR pilot from the last flight).  I think that because my opinion of this company had flown so high (ha, get it?) in the past hour, this flight attendant affected me that much more.  Her griping in the aisles was bad enough to leave a bad taste, when...

"WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE WE'VE GOT THE PLANE LOADED WITH ABOUT 5 MINUTES TO SPARE.  THANK YOU.  A FEW OF YOU WERE BAD, YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE, ROW 13, BUT WE ARE READY."  Yes, she announced that over the intercom.  I wasn't even in row 13 and I was embarrassed!  Well, I was in 12 -but was still wearing my overcoat (not the perpetrator!).

I realized over the course of the next hour that Kathy Griffin (my code name for this flight attendant) was doing what so many of us are guilty of: assuming that her casual, day-to-day persona was appropriate for customers.  I know I do this at times - I become frustrated and start to slip.  I have to remember that my "Californian" (read: sarcastic) sense of humor is not always appreciated!  Not everyone will agree with me and/or understand my references to obscure scientific/technical/literary sources! 

Of course, I had just been reading one of those Denny Hatch articles (which, generally, are quite good) about delighting the customer, so I admit that I was a bit sensitive.  This experience, though, showed me how quickly the simple mistake of becoming too complacent with the stability of your job can cause a rift between a customer and a company.  Though the humble gratitude that the first pilot had shown us was a shining beacon in the dark night that is customer service, this condescending staffer plunged us back into the abyss even deeper than where we started.  I could hear mumblings around me of "THIS is why I don't fly this airline." 

This is a daily battle that we that meet customers must continue to fight.  I do not employ myself, but I must remember that my employer's customers associate me with their feelings about my employer.  This is something that "Kathy Griffin" needs to realize - especially during Freddie Awards season. 

First Impressions

The final descent into Salt Lake City was dark and bumpy.  The snow had subsided for the time being but rocked the plane, as if making an attempt to remind us that it was still there, merely taking a break.

The only reason I decided to take this flight, instead of traveling with my companions, was to be available for a highly stressful meeting regarding OLAP and the co-mingling of an external data source with our native data warehouse.

And while I spent hours - nay, days, preparing for creating a conceptual flow of dimensions and measures, and my demo partner equally worked at diagrams and custom SSIS packages, it was during the demo itself that I came to one realization:

It is the rare occasion that someone cares how this stuff works.  It is much more common that people care about how it looks.

Although the ETL refresh and overlay of data were certainly captivating in their own right, I realize that those who want to see it work are those who haven't seen the end product.  What this means is: Show them a screen that looks like what they want, and they don't care how it got there.

Full disclosure: I actually discovered this a couple of months ago when I built a custom view for a meeting that didn't actually calculate anything; rather it simply transformed data into a different data element type, to better mimic what the client had described.  Simply mocking up a view was all it took to allay concerns.  However, today, in actually performing a detailed "How does it" demonstration, I was very aware that we only had to do this because no proof of concept screen had been available. 

Here's a better example: I don't care gas-efficient the Chevy Cobalt I'm renting is; all I can think about is how hideous a canary-yellow car is!  I'm hung up on the presentation layer when I should be thinking about gas cost or suitability for driving in snow!  Oh, how heavy the burden of pre-disposed preference can be!  But really, who in their right mind would be pre-disposed to like this color?  Who told Chevy that this color was a good choice for a vehicle?  A CLOWN?

In all seriousness, it is this that these two situations, today's meeting and my rental of a heinously painted automobile that has brought me to truly understand that first impressions are so important.  Not rocket science, I know.  However, knowing this should remind us to prepare for each important interaction - to think about and specifically design each first impression (well, at least in business).

Click here to see the atrocity that was my rental.

Not all those who wander are lost (~J. R. R. Tolkien)

I've been in the office for over a month.

The only travel I've managed to do was a quick trip to W. Palm Beach for a nonprofit event, and I was so desperate to get on that plane I looked like a heroin addict who finally managed to score a hit.

So, since I've been landlocked, I've been searching for purpose.  It's been difficult!  Working, self-medicating, and home renovation have begun to lose their appeal.  I've realized that I have truly defined myself by my movement across state/country borders.

What would I do if I were permanently grounded?  I truly believe that this is not an option if I hope to be happy; however, I have come to realize that the travel doesn't have to be quite as much to maintain a stable mind.  Being off the road has forced me to realize that I love not only the people I meet and the places I see, but I truly love the process of traveling.  I love flying in a plane.  I love the feeling of hotel sheets and a puffy duvet on a cold night.  If you do much traveling for your job, you have probably decided by now that I must live in a hovel to enjoy being on the road for these reasons.  Who could possibly prefer the loneliness of the business trip to the comfort of one's own home?

It is these surroundings that truly keep me going, because, like a child, I am still excited by them.  Every time I feel the plane take off, I am overwhelmed with the amazement that Man could engineer such a wonder.  Flying through God's heavens reminds me of the beauty, splendor, and danger of this life.  I wax poetic as I look about the amalgamation of postcards here at the office that represent my journeys.  This is a way of life.

Being this wistful is wearing me out.  Thank goodness I get back out there next week.